Drink 111: Another Brick in the Wallbanger

These orange drinks
are making me angry

Today we have the Harvey Wallbanger. It is one of the rare drinks that can be traced to its origins.  In this case, it was invented in by Duke Antone sometime in the 1950's.  This is a big deal, since Antone also invented several other famous drinks including the Rusty Nail and the White Russian. According to Wikipedia, Antone was a three time world champion mixologist ^{[citation needed]}.  That is quite an accomplishment, I think.  I'm not clear on how they choose the world champion mixologist, but I'm sure it is hotly contested. It is unclear if the Harvey Wallbanger was ever a drink that contributed to one of his championships. It seems unlikely that it could lead to such a prestigious title since the only ingredients are  vodka, orange juice, and Galliano.   It seems like adding Galliano to a Screwdriver isn't really that much of a breakthrough.  The Wallbanger has endured though, making it the most successful subtle twist on an existing classic since this.

The twist was subtle indeed as the drink pretty much tasted like a screwdriver.  There was  the slightest hint of licorice-like Galliano, but that hint worked pretty well in my opinion.  Mrs. Bottle is less tolerant of Galliano so she didn't care for it as much.  She did drink most of it though, so it couldn't have been entirely unpleasant for her.  Although she does have a knack for putting up with things that are unpleasant.

Finally it must be noted that a bit of the Galliano was spilled before it made it into the drink, which may have affected the overall taste.  Mrs. Bottle claims the spillage was unintentional, but given her feelings towards it I remain unconvinced.  I will be keeping a close eye on her the next time she uses Galliano.  Wasting Galliano makes baby FSM cry, mostly because it is so expensive.

Overall Rating for the Harvey Wallbanger

Taste: 3
Presentation: 2
Ease of Preparation: 5
Drinks Until Blackout: 10 – 10% Alcohol

Ingredients

1 oz Vodka
.5 oz Galliano
4 oz Orange Juice

Day 22: New World Order

All it needs is less Galliano

We are on day 5 of the Week of Cream and today we feature the unwelcome return of Galliano.  The Galliano is joined by orange juice, triple sec, and half and half in the Golden Dream.  You may recall that the last time we tried Galliano we exposed the fact that it looks like lemon but tastes like licorice.  We also blew the lid off their trick bottle that only holds half the amount you might expect.  Those were nothing compared to today’s bombshell.

On the first page of the Galliano web site it says:

Galliano is all that is great about Italy. A love of authentic craftsmanship combined with flair and imagination. A belief in doing things the right way, never cutting corners.

A TBIAW inquiry revealed this nugget cleverly hidden on the front of the bottle:

Product of Holland?  So "all that is great about Italy" is a Product of Holland. I think this may be proof that Galliano is affliated with the Illuminati, the Freemasons, and the Trilateral Commission.  The quest for a One World Government is the only possible explantion to the question "how is Italy=Holland?" Fortunately, there is still hope.  You may have heard that the cast of Jersey Shore is headed to Italy to investigate.  If anyone can get to the bottom of this situation, it is JWoww.  I look forward to reading her report.  I hope it also clears up the difference between Holland and The Netherlands.

Somehow we managed to push this controversy to the back of our minds and prepare a Golden Dream.  The drink had a pleasant canary yellow color and a bouquet of orange and anise.  It had a flavor similar to a Creamsicle with a little bit of a licorice bite at the finish.  Both Mrs. Bottle and I enjoyed it, but she thought it would be better with less Galliano.  I suspect she would support a complete elimination.

Maybe we could replace the Galliano with maple syrup.

Overall Rating for the Golden Dream

Taste: 3

Ease of Preparation: 4

Presentation: 3

Drinks until blackout: 8 – Only 16% alcohol

Ingredients:

1 tbsp. Orange Juice

.5 oz. Triple Sec

1 oz. Galliano

1 tbsp. Light Cream

Day 20: Gold Drank

At The Bottle Is a Wonderland our main focus is making the reader happy.  When we receive a reader request we make every effort to honor it as long as it fits in with what we already have planned.  We recently received this request:

“I want you to try a Golden Cadillac and let me know if it's as awful as I remember”

You would have to be a callous jerk to ignore such a well-reasoned and thoughtful request. It really tugged at our heart strings.  Not to mention that the Golden Cadillac contains cream and fits right in with our Week of Cream.



Off-White Cadillac


Besides cream, the Golden Cadillac also has crème de cocoa (white), and Galliano. When I saw those ingredients I thought to myself, “Self, this is going to taste good.”  The chocolate flavor of the crème de cocoa would mix nicely with the cream and the banana flavor of the Galliano.  Or does Galliano taste like lemon?  I knew it was yellow so it had to be one of those so either way it would complement chocolate and cream.  It turns out that the yellow is some kind of trick because Galliano’s primary flavor component is anise.  Anise is what you would think of as licorice flavor. When I learned this I thought to myself, “Self, this is going to taste bad.”



We headed to the store and picked up some Galliano, which comes in its famous stupid skinny bottle.  As far as I can tell, the main reason the bottle is so skinny is to disguise that you are paying $21 for a 375 ml bottle of hooch by making it the same height as a 750 ml bottle.  You could get a half gallon of Aristocrat Vodka for $21 and have enough left over for a $5 footlong. Since we are going to need Galliano for many other drinks on our journey, we coughed up the cash (see right sidebar).  As is our custom, Mrs. Bottle and I sampled the Galliano straight before mixing it.  It definitely had a strong anise component, but it wasn’t as strong as Sambuca.  Mrs. Bottle thought it tasted like medicine and I couldn’t fully disagree.  I like licorice, though, and didn’t find the flavor unpleasant.  It was certainly better than Robitussin.

Used in a Purple Cadillac

We tossed the ingredients into the Magic Bullet (a TBIAW first) and combined them with some crushed ice.  After blending, we strained into a chilled champagne flute.  That is actually a lot tougher than it sounds.  It required dexterity and a funnel.  We both thought the drink smelled atrocious.  We were still hopeful that, much like Spaghetti-O’s, the Golden Cadillac would smell bad but taste delicious.  It was not delicious.  It wasn’t horrible, but we just didn’t think the chocolate and anise flavors complemented each other well.   We were hoping it would be a little better.  After all, it was invented at a barbecue stand and most are known for their mixed drinks.

To definitively answer the question, “is the Golden Cadillac as awful as I remember?” we say, “How the hell would we know?”

Overall Rating for the Golden Cadillac

 

Taste: 2

Ease of Preparation: 2

Presentation: 4 – Mostly because the champagne flute classes it up

Drinks until blackout: 6 – At around 21% alcohol it would take a few.

Ingredients:

1 oz. Galliano

2 oz. Crème de Cocoa (White)

1 oz. Light Cream