Drink 202: The First Straw

Not actual size

It has been almost nine months since our last entry at TBIAW.  If rumors are true, that is just about enough time to grow and hatch a baby. When you put it into that kind of context, this entry will seem even more deficient than it would have otherwise.

We thought we were out of the blogging business, but we saw something recently that required us to jump back in, if only temporarily.  What was that thing? It was the Bud Light Lime STRAW-BER-RITA Margarita with a Twist. It seems almost impossible that it was less than a year ago that we discovered the Bud Light Lime LIME-A-RITA and now they have a strawberry version.

We had seen it once or twice before, but the other day we were at our local wine and beer emporium and that 24 ounce can was just sitting there in the cooler between the Bartles & Jaymes and the Four Loko asking to be purchased.  We bit the bullet and did so even with the knowledge that it would invite ridicule from the checkout boy. Which it did.

Thank goodness they had instructions right on the can. With pictures.

For the last two weeks that can has been staring us in the face every time we open the fridge but we resisted the temptation.  But seeing as today was Memorial Day, we could think of no greater to way to honor our fallen servicemen and servicewomen than to catch a buzz on some All American malt beverage with natural flavors, artificial sweetener and artificial color.  USA USA! (Ed note: The authors choose to willfully ignore the fact that Budweiser is owned by the Belgian/Brazilian InBev.)

The instructions worked!

Mrs. Bottle made the mistake of eating an actual strawberry before trying her Bud Light Lime STRAW-BER-RITA Margarita. As a result she thought it didn’t taste very strawberry-y. I thought it had a reasonable artificially sweetened artificial strawberry flavor, though.  Kind of like a Nehi that will get you plowed eventually.  After Mrs. Bottle cleansed her palate with some Tostitos, she agreed. And right now she is dancing in the kitchen singing Journey's "Who's Crying Now?" so the alcohol must work, too. 

Overall Rating for Bud Light Lime STRAW-BER-RITA

Taste: 3
Presentation: 3
Ease of Preparation: 5
Drinks Until Blackout: 5

Ingredients

Malt Beverage

Natural Flavors

Artificial Sweetener

Artificial Color

Drink 198: I do not think it means what you think it means

So I was wandering through one of the dozen Target stores within 10 minutes of the Bottle Wonderland Estate yesterday stocking up on cat litter, coffee pods, and household cleaner and I noticed something glorious: Bud Light Lime LIME-A-RITA.  “Wait, what?” is what any rational person would be thinking right now.  Most of our readers will have to trust me on that.

I was going to "green screen"
the background but decided
to go with fake Instagram effects

Well, according to the box, Bud Light Lime LIME-A-RITA is “FLAVORED BEER.”  Yum!  One thing I am looking for in a beer is some flavor.  I shot Mrs. Bottle a knowing glance and she returned it. We immediately flung a 12 pack into our cart and sprinted to the checkout. We hadn’t been this simpatico since our decision to give up exercise and let our bodies just take the form God intended.

See?

We drove home with the intention of putting these bad boys into our blast chiller to rapidly cool them and enjoy some a little later.  Then I noticed that it says right on the box to “try it over ice” so upon our arrival back at the Estate we decided to immediately tear into the package and have some over ice.  As directed by the box.

If this didn't have so many
kick-ass effects you
would see how my hand
dwarfs the can. You might
also be able to read where
it says "220 Calories"

After the foam settled, I took a big gulp delicate sip. It actually didn’t taste horrible, but I don’t know that there is much difference between drinking this stuff and drinking Zima.  Well, there are a couple of subtle differences:  Alcohol-wise it comes in at 8%, which puts it between a Zima and a Four Loko.  It is packaged in dainty 8 oz cans, too, so you can fit several into your murse, which is nice.

I tried to rationalize this by thinking it could make a tolerable summertime drink when I didn’t have time to whip up a batch of authentic margaritas.   It is made from Bud Light, so at least it will be low calorie, right?  WRONG!  That dinky 8oz can has 220 calories.  220!  That is more calories than a Krispy Kreme doughnut, for Pete’s sake!   Heck, it is 104 more calories than a 12oz Bud Light Lime beer.  Which also has flavor.

I had to learn more so I went to their web site.  Here is the entire contents of the “About” page:

Introducing Lime-A-Rita

The refreshing ready-to-drink margarita with a twist of Bud Light Lime.

Look for it wherever Bud Light Lime is sold!

Now I feel totally informed.

Overall Rating for Bud Light Lime LIME-A-RITA

Taste: 4

Presentation: 2

Ease of Preparation: 5

Drinks Until Blackout: 5

Ingredients

Margarita

Twist of Bud Light Lime

Calories