Drink 147: Drinflation

I have spent a lot of time recently worrying about inflation, but I’m not talking about end of Quantitative Easing 2 and how it might impact the future of the worldwide economy. I’m talking about something much more important.  And that thing is the nagging suspicion that there is rating inflation at TBIAW.  Lately it has seemed like we have been giving the drinks higher ratings than we used to and it has become a growing concern.  We understand that the vast majority of the Internet gets its drink rating information from TBIAW and we give our rating duties the requisite amount of consideration.

Since we maintain a complete database of all of our rated drinks, we decided to conduct a thorough TBIAW investigation to determine if the Fed needs to step in to reduce rating inflation or if we should continue to allow market forces to shape the scores. Plus, there are few things on this Earth I love more than making charts.  Also, whenever I can’t think of a post idea it seems like there is some way we can just talk about our favorite subjects, us.

With that in mind, we produced this chart showing the cumulative average of our drink ratings:

You can clearly see that the average rating has been steadily trending upwards, a troubling sign.  I also noticed that the standard deviation of the ratings is shrinking.  At some point down the road all three lines will converge.  This could lead to some kind of poltergeist-like black hole where the world swallows itself.  Probably not, but it is still something to keep in the back of your mind as we reach December.

We also took a look at the running totals for the number of drinks with each rating:

You can see that our twos, threes, and fours were fairly consistent, and then some point around drink 80 our twos start to fall behind.  It also appears that around drink 100 we start to hand out fives like they were free kisses.  The combination of these factors appears to be the cause of our creeping average score.

What is causing these changes?  I can think of three possible explanations:

1. Our tastes are changing. This seems like a likely candidate. As we’ve tried more drinks we have become more accepting of certain flavors and flavor combinations. This became evident when we recently revisited some old drinks and realized that we would have given them higher scores if we rated them today.

2. We are selecting drinks with a “success bias”. That is, Mrs. Bottle has been picking out fewer bad drinks. There is some basis in truth here as well as Mrs. Bottle admitted that she has been avoiding the 371 different varieties of the Martini that Mr. Boston uses to pad its pages. There would be a lot of opportunities for low scores had we tried those drinks.

3. We are trying to raise the drinks’ self-esteem. We love our drinks and we feel bad when we have to give one a low score. Therefore we may have become more likely to give a drink the benefit of the doubt.

4. It can all be blamed on random noise. Maybe we are just on a run of good drinks and over time things will even out. If things do even out, it certainly will not be because I purposely start down-grading drinks to level the score.

You are probably wondering how all of this will impact our latest drink, the Kentucky Blizzard, a combination of bourbon, cranberry juice, lime juice, grenadine, and sugar.  We chose this particular drink not only because it isn’t a Martini but also because Mrs. Bottle’s parents are visiting us here at the Estate and her father is a bourbon man.  He found the drink pleasant enough, but didn’t express a lot of opinion either way.  Of course, he is pretty low key about most things.  When he found out his only daughter was getting married he just raised an eyebrow and proclaimed, “hmm.”   It signaled happiness, disappointment, or indifference.  I choose to believe it was happiness.

When I think "Blizzard" I think bright red with an orange

Mrs. Bottle and I both thought the drink wasn’t bad, especially considering it had 1.5 ounces of whiskey, our least favorite spirit.  If anything, it could have used a little more bourbon because it was a bit too sweet.  It probably could have used less grenadine or sugar, too.  We both thought a little lime juice wouldn’t hurt, either.  Ultimately, we gave it a three.  It may have gotten a four last week before we installed our new rating austerity measures.  The grade of three didn’t stop us from finishing it, though.  Shortly after the last drop was consumed, Mrs. Bottle’s father came into the room and asked where the rest of his drink was.  I guess he liked it more than we thought.

Overall rating for the Kentucky Blizzard

 

Taste: 3

Presentation: 5

Ease of Preparation: 4

Drinks Until Blackout: 8 – 14% Alcohol

Ingredients

1.5 oz Bourbon Whiskey

1.5 oz Cranberry Juice

0.5 oz Lime Juice

0.5 oz Grenadine

1 tsp Sugar

Drink 114: Sucks and the City 2

Still better than Sex and the City 2

Early on in TBIAW, Mrs. Bottle and I tried the Manhattan.  If you didn't just click that link (and I recommend you always click our links), here is the short version of our review: "The Manhattan consists of whiskey, sweet vermouth, and Angostura bitters. It tastes more like it is made out of ass."  Why am I bringing this up?  Because today we bring you the Manhattan (Dry) and here is the review: The Manhattan (Dry) consists of whiskey, dry vermouth, and Angostura bitters. It tastes more like it is made out of slightly less ass.

The only difference in the two Manhattans is the vermouth.  Luckily for us, this one used dry vermouth, which is slightly less gross than sweet vermouth.  We also used rye this time instead of bourbon. I'm not sure why we did that since both of us preferred bourbon to rye in our whiskey taste test.  Regardless it did seem slightly better than the Manhattan. We were also supposed to garnish with an olive, but Mrs. Bottle hates olives and doesn't allow them in the house so that was a non-starter.  She won't let me eat olives, either, so I don't even know if I like them.  I'm sure that the olive would have made this drink awesome, though.

Overall Rating for the Manhattan (Dry)

Taste: 2
Ease of Preparation: 4

Presentation: 3
Drinks until blackout: 4 – A little over 35% alcohol

Ingredients:

2 oz Whiskey

.5 oz Dry Vermouth

1 dash Angostura Bitters

Feets of Strength

It is finally here.  The highly anticipated and equally dreaded whisk(e)y taste test. So far our first two taste tastes each led to surprises. In the vodka taste test we learned that a cheap Russian vodka tasted better than the more expensive and more well-known brands.  In the light beer taste test we learned that mass produced light beer pretty much all tasted the same.  Oh wait, that wasn’t the surprise.  The surprise was that our two devoted Miller Lite drinkers both actually liked Bud Light better.  Will the whisk(e)y taste test lead to a surprise?  If neither of us retches during the test, I would consider that I surprise.

Our Contenders

Since whiskey (I’m going to stop with the parentheses after this) has many different sub-categories, this test will be slightly different than our previous two.  Instead of picking the best of a specific variety, we will be tasting several different types of whiskey to see which one we hate the least.  I’m not going to spend a bunch of time explaining the differences since there are plenty of other resources available for that. Our selected choices are based purely what we have on hand in the Bottle Wonderland Bar.  We have two Kentucky bourbons, a Kentucky rye, a Canadian blended whisky, an Irish whiskey, and a Scotch whisky.

Without further ado, let’s meet the competitors:

Wild Turkey Kentucky Straight Bourbon Whiskey – According to Wikipedia, Wild Turkey “suggest[s] a rough, hard-living person” or “a person with ‘white trash’ traits”.  Those of you who know us personally understand how those descriptions fit us to a T. I’m as hard as they come.  The suburb I grew up in didn’t even have all-brick houses.  Through hard work and perseverance, we were able to work our way up to our current brick-fronted Bottle Wonderland Estate. We did it with no help from anyone other than our parents paying for college and buying us stuff.   That hardscrabble life is why we drink Wild Turkey.

Maker’s Mark Kentucky Straight Bourbon Whisky – Maker’s Mark is a little more froo-froo than Wild Turkey. There are some clues right on the bottle.  The first is the famous red wax seal, although I admit it looks kind of cool. The second clue is that they spell whisky without the “e”.  Typically, bourbon whiskey is spelled whiskey, not whisky.  Who are they trying to kid with this tomfoolery?  I guess it worked, though, since we have a bottle. It is 90 proof, making it stronger than most of today’s competition.  Maker’s Mark has a lot of information on their web site, but I couldn’t find anything that really described what the taste is.

Jim Beam Rye – There are several drinks in the Mr. Boston guide that specifically call for rye.  It turns out that rye can be a little difficult to find at the ABC store.  Once we found it we were presented with the choice of Jim Beam or Wild Turkey.  The Beam was cheaper, so that’s what we have.  According to their web site, Jim Beam is America’s best selling rye.  Congratulations, Jim Beam, you beat out your one competitor!  I think it may have more to do with their cheaper price than the fact that it is “spicy, bold, and flavorful”.  I was also glad to see that Jim Beam is made with 51% rye, which is the minimum amount required to be called rye.  We here at TBIAW are huge supporters of doing the minimum required.  If they used more than 51% it might make the other rye look bad.

Whisky Purse

Crown Royal Black Blended Canadian Whisky – Crown Royal is our first contender from outside the USA.  It comes from Canada, America’s Hat.   This whisky is actually a guest in our home.  Mrs. Bottle’s father inadvertently left it here over Christmas.  Since we are bad children, we have not returned it yet.  I don’t know much about Crown Royal other than the fact that their bottles come in a little purse. People try to tell me that I am not manly because I don’t like whisky, but at least gin doesn’t come in a purse. The Crown Royal Black eschews the traditional purple purse for a black one, making it the perfect companion for a night on the town with the girls.  Mrs. Bottle’s father claims that this whisky is smooth and thinks we might like it. Even though it is a strong 90 proof, their web site says it has “dark, sweet, maple notes and a light vanilla flavor towards the finish”.  That sounds delicious to me.  Maybe I’ll pour some on a pancake.

Jameson Irish Whiskey – When we do our taste tests, we try to learn a little about each of the contenders.  We distil the information and share with you only the most interesting tidbits.  For example, it turns out that Jameson Irish Whiskey is made in Ireland. The main thing I learned from the Jameson web site is that in Ireland they spell “distill” with only one “l”.   They had to conserve the “l” to make up for the extra “u” they liberally sprinkle where it doesn’t belong.  Their site also infourms us that Jameson has a “sweet nutty flavour” and “toasted wood and vanilla notes”.  I love toasted wood with some cinnamon sugar and a nice poached egg.

Johnnie Walker Black Label Old Scotch Whisky – Johnnie Walker has five different colored labels they use to distinguish their whiskies. Their rainbow of flavors makes them a favorite in the LGBT community.   Black Label is their second tier offering.  It is a “unique blend with a smooth, deep and complex character”.  That doesn’t tell me a lot about what to expect.  What are they hiding?  According to their web site, Black Label is “regarded by experts as the ultimate Scotch deluxe whisky, the benchmark by which all others are measured.”  If that is the case, it seems that their Green, Gold, and Blue labels are superfluous. Like many of the whisky manufacturers, Johnnie Walker has a club you can join to let everyone know what product you like.  Theirs is called the “Striding Man Society”.   They have an annual meeting in the desert just like Burning Man, but with less ecstasy and more striding.   

Whiskies ready to be tasted.  They are also ready for the Olympics

As before, the tasting was set up so neither Mrs. Bottle nor I knew which cup contained which whiskey.  Instead of ranking them from favorite to least favorite, we simply picked our “favorite”, and then tried to guess which was which.  I actually knew which one was the Crown Royal because it was significantly darker than the others, but I did not know what the other five were.

Before we get to our notes, we must warn that if you are looking for some fancy-schmancy reviews where we give subtle details about the differences of the various whiskies you will not find it here.  It’s not to say that we didn’t try, though.  We spent many minutes sniffing and swishing and generally looking like accomplished snobs aficionados.  It didn’t matter though.  Our palates are not conditioned for whiskey and my vocabulary does not contain phrases like “the nose has notes of pepper, butterscotch, honey, and a pointed hint of citrus that really highlights the softer, sweeter flavors.”  Maybe people can really taste all that, but I remain skeptical.

Let me share with you our notes:

Wild Turkey Bourbon:  Smooth; slight burning; pretty good; more feet-like.  Off to a decent start.  Rating a “pretty good” is high praise from us.

Maker’s Mark Bourbon: Smells sweet; a little like caramel; a little burn; not altogether horrible. Again, I consider this a victory for Maker’s Mark.

Jim Beam Rye: First not too bad, then got worse; Not burning; Harsh; bitter.  Notice that the words “spicy, bold, and flavorful” did not appear.  I suppose “harsh and bitter” could be “bold and flavorful.”

Crown Royal Black Blended Whisky: Nostrils burn, but a different taste than #1 [Maker’s Mark]; Harsh, but not as bad as #5 [Jameson]. It did not taste like something I would want to put on a pancake.

Jameson Irish Whiskey: Smells floral; Awful; Harsh but not feet-y.  Hmm…this isn’t good.  I thought I was learning to like Irish whiskey but maybe not.  It certainly was not as good as toasted wood.

Johnnie Walker Black Scotch: Feet; I can’t tell my taste buds are dead.  There you have it.  Mrs. Bottle has been saying Scotch tasted like feet and this test confirmed it.



Celebratory shot of Maker's Mark
with built in Coke Zero chaser



So there you have it. In the whiskey taste test, everyone is a loser, especially us.  And possibly you, if you made it this far.  We didn’t love any of them, but in fairness, this taste test was more pleasant than the vodka taste test.  In that one the burning sensation was terrible.  For the most part, the whiskies were smoother and had more flavor than straight vodka.  The downside was that the flavor was that of feet.

Guessing which was which was a tough challenge, especially considering neither of us had ever tasted the rye or Canadian whisky before. Mrs. Bottle correctly identified the Johnnie Walker and I was able to get the two bourbons, but we got all the rest wrong.  When it was time to pick our “favorites”, Mrs. Bottle liked the Wild Turkey, and I liked the Maker’s Mark.  This was sort of like picking your favorite deadly bacteria (it’s a dead heat between E. coli and MRSA).

Regardless, a winner was chosen and that must be celebrated.  To reach that end, I dipped various body parts into red wax.  Normally we only do that on special occasions and Saturdays.

Day 81: Making Betty Botter's Bitters Batter Better

Maybe the Fox River is murky?

It is hard to keep coming up with ways to introduce the daily drink and list its ingredients.  Invariably it ends up being a variation on “today’s drink is the XYZ, a mixture of some alcohol and some other ingredients.”  Every once in a while we might get creative and/or bust out the thesaurus, but even that only gives us so many options.  The first step towards solving any problem is recognizing that you have a problem, though, so I think we are well on our ways towards finding a solution. Don’t think for one minute that a boring sentence or two or three or four means that we are mailing it in.  Care and thoughtfulness are put into every wird in this blog.

Today’s drink is the Fox River Cocktail, a mixture of bourbon (or rye) whiskey, brown crème de cacao, and bitters (oops, we did it again). Even with two ounces of bourbon, the Fox River Cocktail was not the worst drink we’ve ever had.  It actually was almost good despite the fact that it was extremely strong, coming in at over 37% alcohol.  It is one of those drinks that makes your stomach and throat warm when you take a sip.  That is the feeling of protective lining rotting away, so it might even be an effective weight loss measure. The primary flavor was of course the bourbon, but the crème de cacao did manage to take a little of the edge off and the bitters was definitely noticeable. This drink had four dashes of bitters, which is four more than most drinks have, and three more than most drinks with bitters have.

Bitters is alcohol infused with aromatic herbs.  The Angostura Bitters that we used is 44.7% alcohol.  Even though it is typically very strong, you can buy it in the grocery store and as far as I know you don’t get carded when buying bitters.  I am not advocating that our underage readers go load up on bitters, though.  Vanilla extract is a tastier option.  If you’ve ever had Jägermeister then you know what bitters tastes like: cough syrup.  I happen to love cough syrup, so I find the bitters flavor quite pleasant.  Bitters isn’t always bitter, though, it can also be bittersweet. That makes “bitters” a terrible name not only because it ends in “s” making subject-verb agreement confusing, but also because it is a bit misleading.

The giant label does not hide the bitterness
(Img: © Chriusha (Хрюша) / CC-BY-SA-3.0)

If you do happen to find bitters too bitter there is new hope.  Researchers have recently discovered a chemical that blocks the taste buds that are receptors for bitterness.  The chemical is called GIV3616.  The people who named it couldn’t even get over the incredibly low bar for naming that “bitters” established.  At any rate, I am looking forward to the day GIV3616 becomes commercially available. On that day I will make a drink that has both bitters and GIV3616 and let them fight to the death.  It will be glorious. I will also liberally use GIV3616 to cut down on the bitterness of vegetables.  It will probably be a better option than my current bitter blocker of cheese sauce.


Overall Rating for the Fox River Cocktail

Taste: 2 – Just missed a 3
Presentation: 4
Ease of Preparation: 4
Drinks Until Blackout: 3 – 37% Alcohol

Ingredients

2 oz Whiskey (Bourbon or Rye)
1 tbsp Crème de Cocoa (Brown)
4 dashes Bitters

Day 54: Bourbonic Plague

Unfortunately the garnish
didn't completely block the
mouth of the glass

Our cocktail today is called California Lemonade and it has lemon juice, lime juice, grenadine, club soda, and simple syrup Unfortunately for us it also features whiskey, our least favorite spirit other than that freaky kid in The Ring.  Apparently people in California have no idea what lemonade tastes like because this drink tasted nothing like it.  In case anyone reading this lives in California, here is what lemonade should taste like: Sugar and lemons.  Here is what the so-called California Lemonade tasted like: Sour and ass.

That may be a bit of hyperbole, but this drink was pretty bad.  The ratio of sour stuff to sweet stuff was way off.  We have had enough drinks now to know that if you have a lot of sour juice, you need a lot of simple syrup or some other sweet element to balance it. A 1:1 ratio is probably best, slightly less if you don’t have a sweet tooth.  The California Lemonade had 3 ounces of lemon and lime juice with only 1 tablespoon of simple syrup and ¼ teaspoon of grenadine.  That is about a 5.5:1 ratio of sour to sweet, which is too much for any right-thinking person.  The sour was so powerful that it almost completely masked the whiskey, which was its one redeeming quality

Speaking of whiskey, I am starting to wonder why I want to learn to like it in the first place.  The good stuff is really expensive and we don’t need that at the Bottle Wonderland Estate.  Simply maintaining our Renaissance garden consumes a large portion of our budget.  I suppose I am supposed to like whiskey because someone decided it was manly and it shows some sort of toughness to drink something that tastes bad. Paregoric tastes bad, too, and contains more alcohol than whiskey. Why didn’t that become popular?  Probably because paregoric prevents diarrhea, and we all know that not wanting diarrhea is for wusses.

Requires a lot of Roundup

The thing about the California Lemonade is that it contains whiskey but still isn’t manly.  Even I know that walking around with a drink that has a lemon, orange, and a cherry as garnishes does not exude machismo.  It is also served with straws.  Not one straw, multiple straws.  The jury is out on whether it is manly to drink out a straw or not, but I am confident you won’t see a bunch of coal miners sipping straws from the same drink.  I guess the multiple straws are good when you say “hey this is terrible, you should try it!” and you don’t want to spread cooties.  Cooties are not manly.

Overall Rating for California Lemonade

Taste: 2 - So very close to a 1

Presentation: 4

Ease of Preparation: 1

Drinks Until Blackout: 9 – 10% Alcohol

Ingredients

2 oz Whiskey

2 oz Lemon Juice

1 oz Lime Juice

1 tbsp Simple Syrup

.25 oz Grenadine

Club soda

Day 36: No Shirt, No Shoes, No Dice

It is day four of Romance Week and today we are trying something a little different, a hot drink.  Of the 35 drinks we have had so far, only one was hot.  Today’s drink is called the Hot Kiss and it is a mix of hot coffee, Irish whiskey, crème de menthe and crème de cocoa. To mark this special occasion, we actually purchased an Irish coffee glass.  We are nothing if not dedicated to producing the highest quality blog we can given our lack of talent.

Our Cup Runneth Over

Since it is romance week I feel like we should be dispensing some romantic advice.  In all modesty, there probably isn’t a better source on the planet than me, but “romance tips” articles are played out and I actually don’t know anything. Instead of droning on about fixing your girlfriend dinner or making her a mix tape, I thought our time would be better spent analyzing two recent romances in the news to see if we can learn anything. 

Doesn't see the problem

Let’s start with Mark Sanchez.  You may have heard that Mr. Sanchez has allegedly been “dating” a 17-year-old high school student. Some people might think that he is creepy for doing so, but I don’t. I’ve dated a few 17-year-old high school girls myself and really enjoyed it.  Of course I was 17 at the time.  Really, Mark’s only mistake is that he is 24.    Well that’s probably not his only mistake.  He probably should have asked her not to post about it on Facebook.  He could have mentioned it right after he plowed her field.  On FarmVille, that is.  I really hope the resultant media attention doesn’t sour their relationship or hurt her GPA. I’m not really worried about the impact on Sanchez’ career, because on the Jets his behavior qualifies as prudish.

I wouldn't be able to resist
(Image: Gawker)

Our next case study is (former) Congressman Christopher Lee (R-NY).  Mr. Lee resigned from Congress on Wednesday after it came out that he had apparently been soliciting dates on Craigslist.  This would have been fine if Mr. Lee wasn’t married.  Or if he was seeking only married women to date.  As far as I know, it isn’t cheating as long as all parties are married to someone.   His second mistake was sending a shirtless picture to some stranger.  That is no way to a lady's heart.  He should have sent a junk shot like everybody else, amiright?  I guess he is pretty fit and likes to show off the bod, but when I take shirtless pictures of myself in the mirror I usually go with a more casual pant.

I don't know if either Mr. Sanchez or Mr. Lee uses a Hot Kiss when wooing a potential mate, but it wouldn't hurt.  Unless, of course, it is served it to a minor.  Anyway, the drink was very good and moves into our top drink list.  The drink had a rich coffee flavor with nice mint and chocolate undertones.  It also scores well on the romance scale.  A nice Hot Kiss in front of a fireplace on a cold winter's night would certainly be welcomed by any right-thinking person.  A little whipped cream never hurts, either.  It is also good on the drink. The Hot Kiss was also garnished with a chocolate covered mint, but it sank to the bottom before we could take a picture.  It was a heart-shaped peppermint patty and it looked great for the 3 seconds it was visible.  A Junior Mint probably would have been a safer choice, if less attractive. 

If we have learned anything from the Hot Kiss, Mr. Lee, or Mr. Sanchez it is this: The legal age of consent in New York is 17.

Overall Rating for the Hot Kiss

Taste: 5

Presentation: 5

Ease of Preparation: 3

Drinks Until Blackout: 10  - Only 9% Alcohol

Romance Score: 5

Ingredients

1 oz Irish Whiskey

.5 oz Crème de Menthe

.5 oz Crème de Cocoa

6 oz Hot Coffee (we used 5.25 oz because that's what our coffee machine makes)

Day 16: Sucks and the City

Cherry Bomb

Neither Mrs. Bottle nor I had heard of most of the drinks we have tried so far, so for today’s drink we decided to go with something classic, the Manhattan.  The Manhattan consists of whiskey, sweet vermouth, and Angostura bitters. It tastes more like it is made out of ass.

Okay, that may be a bit harsh (just like this drink…rim shot!).  We suspect that we didn’t like the Manhattan because we don’t like whiskey.  We both thought the drink mostly tasted and smelled like straight bourbon.  In order to test this, we poured a little Wild Turkey into a glass and tried it straight.  It turns out that the Manhattan is much better than straight bourbon, similar to the way a punch in the stomach is better than a punch in the junk.

I wondered how this drink became a classic so I did some research and it turns out the Manhattan was invented some time in the mid to late 1800’s.  Then it became clear to me: The people of the late 1800’s had no idea how to have fun.  A popular leisure activity of the time was hoop and stick.  Wee! No wonder this drink became popular.  It bested the current champion, Gin and Soot.

Time for a Game of Hoop and Stick

We still hope that we can develop a palate for whiskey.  Obviously a lot of people like it so it must be possible to enjoy it.   Until that happens, it will be tough for any of the whiskey drinks to earn a high score.

Luckily for us, there are at least two more variations on the Manhattan left for us to try.  We can hardly wait.

Overall Rating:

Taste: 2 – Only because we are giving the benefit of the doubt to whiskey fans.

Ease of Preparation: 4

Presentation: 4 – It has a cherry!

Drinks until blackout: 4 – A little over 35% alcohol

Ingredients:

2 oz Whiskey

.5 oz Sweet Vermouth

1 dash Angostura Bitters

Day 4: Whiskey A Go Go

So pretty!

Mrs. Bottle and I wanted to mix it up a bit today, so we decided to try a drink called the Scottish Guard.  It consists of Bourbon Whiskey, orange juice, lime juice, and grenadine.  Why is this mixing it up?  Because neither of us really like nor drink whiskey.  During this journey we are going to end up drinking a lot of it.  Therefore we will either acquire a taste for it or end up having a lot of drinks we hate. Let’s hope for the former.  I think the latter is a given considering some of the drink recipes we’ve seen in the book.

This drink is visually a lot more interesting than our prior ones.  It is one step ahead of the others already since it is served in a cocktail glass. It is hard to go wrong with a nice cocktail glass.  It also has a bit of grenadine for some color.  What is grenadine?  I’m glad I asked.  It is a sweet syrup generally made from pomegranates.  Since we didn’t have any in our bar  I went to the store and bought a bottle of Rose’s Grenadine ($3.85)  Looking at the ingredients, it is mostly corn sugar high fructose corn syrup. And water.  I don’t see pomegranate listed anywhere.  Maybe it is in the “natural flavors”.

Red 40 - Blue 1 was also the 2010 election result

For today’s bourbon, we chose Wild Turkey. Primarily because it was the only bourbon we had that was already open. I can’t say how it compares to others because I’ve never met a bourbon that I liked.  Oh well, maybe someday.

I thought it smelled good, pretty much like fruity bourbon.  Mrs. Bottle’s first reaction was "it tastes like bourbon with juice in it” so the smell wasn’t misleading.  She then proclaimed, "It's better than drinking straight bourbon."  I concurred.  Barely.  It might be a while before we acquire the taste for bourbon.

Scotchgard protects your carpet from stains.  A Scottish Guard could very well lead to fresh carpet stains.  Think of them as yin and yang.

Ratings on a 10-point scale:

Taste: 3

Ease of preparation: 7

Presentation: 8.5

Drinks until blackout: 5 – This one comes in at 22% alcohol but it tastes like it is 90%.  We doubt either of us could make it to 5 of these.

Liquor, Liquor, Everywhere...

Normally Mrs. Bottle and I live a life of relaxed luxury where we sit around, drink, and ponder who might win Top Chef.  Due to some unfortunate circumstances, we have had to remain stone cold sober for the last couple evenings.  That makes it difficult to update a blog about drinking.  That isn’t going to stop me from making a post, though.  We inventoried our pre-blog liquor cabinet and we are happy to share it (the inventory, not the liquor) with you.

Behold a loosely organized list with the proof and an occasional note:

Whiskey

Wild Turkey Bourbon (80)

Johnnie Walker Black Label Scotch (80) - Purchased for a visit from my dad but found out he stopped drinking

Maker's Mark Bourbon (80) - For my father-in-law's visits

Rum

Bacardi Select Dark Rum (80)

Bacardi Superior Light Rum (80)

Captain Morgan Spiced Rum (70)

Captain Morgan Silver Spiced Rum (70)

Captain Morgan Parrot Bay Pineapple Rum  (42)

Gin

Tangueray Rangpur Gin (82.6) - This is my go-to drink for staying in

Bombay Sapphire Gin (94) - My favorite with tonic when dining out

Tanqueray 10 Gin (94.6) - Another high-end gin with a distinctive flavor

Tanqueray Gin (94.6) - Have to have some cheap stuff

Gordon's Gin (80) - I guess it can get cheaper

Seagram's Gin (80)

Vodka

Absolut Flavor of the Tropics Vodka (80) - This is one of Absolut's special vodkas you can only get in duty-free shops

Absolut Ruby Red Vodka (80)

Absolut Mandarin Vodka (80)

Happy Vodka (80) - Mrs. Bottle purchased this soley based on the bottle.  It tastes it.

Chopin Vodka (80)

Soli Oranj Vodka (80)

Stoli Vanil Vodka (70) - Yummy with Coke

Finlandia Cranberry Fusion Vodka (80)

Grey Goose Vodka (80)

Grey Goose L'Orange Vodka (80) – Mrs. Bottle’s favorite

Tequila

Don Julio Tequila (Blanco) (80)

Cabo Wabo Reposado Tequila (80)

Sauza Tres Generaciones Tequila (80)

Sauza Tres Generaciones Plata Tequila (80)

Herradura Silver Tequila (80)

Tequila De Los Altos - Silver (80)

Liqueur / Schnapps / Miscellaneous

Ciclón (Rum infused with Tequila and Lime) (70) - I'm pretty sure I've had this for about 10 years.  It is good but I just don't drink it very often.

Pama Pomegranate Liqueur (34)

Amaretto Liqueur (42)

Pomegranate Schnapps (30)

Melon Liqueur (46)

Chateau Monet Framboise Liqueur (33) - A raspberry liqueur essential for Red Headed Sluts

99 Bananas (99) - Winner for "highest proof" of anything in our liquor cabinet

Peachtree Schnapps (30)

Blackberry Brandy (70)

Buttershots Butterscotch Liqueur (30) - This is the start of the "tastes good in coffee or hot chocolate" section

Godiva Original Liqueur (30)

Peppermint Schnapps (60)

Baily's Irish Cream (34)

Kahlua Liqueur (53) - This is the end of the "tastes good in coffee or hot chocolate" section

Goldschlager Cinnamon Schnapps (87) - With real gold!

Pisco Reservado (80)

Triple Sec (42)

Grand Marnier Orange Liqueur (80)

Patron Citronage Orange Liqueur (80)

Zwack Liqueur (80) - Hungary's answer to Jägermeister

Since we started the blog we had to buy Southern Comfort (70).  We also bought some Angustora Aromatic Bitters.  It will be interesting to see how we expand both our waistlines and our liquor cabinet.