Thursday, February 24, 2011

Day 48: Crystal Blech

Walters Cocktail
Breaking Worse
Today’s drink is the Walters, a mix of Scotch whisky, orange juice, and lemon juice.  Mrs. Bottle selected this drink in honor of Walter White, the anti-hero of Breaking Bad, one of our favorite shows.  We have two episodes of Breaking Bad on our DVR right now, so we will be watching some Walters this weekend.  I think we will find those more enjoyable than drinking a Walters.

It has been well established that we are not fans of whisky.  We did like our last whisky drink though, so there was a chance we might like the Walters.  Unfortunately it didn’t work out that way.  The aroma of the drink was primarily Scotch, but there was a hint of citrus.  The flavor was pure terrible.  I thought it tasted vaguely like a cigarette. All Mrs. Bottle could say was how awful it was.  I am used to hearing her say how awful it was and I was glad Walter wasn’t here to hear it and feel the same shame I have.

Note: There will be some Breaking Bad spoilers if you can spoil something that aired 2 years ago

Breaking Bad can sometimes be difficult to watch because the protagonist Walter White is frequently unlikeable.  In this respect he is much like the Walters cocktail. Sometimes I wonder if Walter might be the worst person on TV.  While trying to think of someone worse, there was a repeat of Toddlers and Tiaras on in the background that caught my eye.  For no reason at all, I thought we could list some direct quotes from a mom on that episode and some events from Breaking Bad:

Toddlers and Tiaras: “I decided to put SamiJo in pageants ‘cause that was the whole reason I wanted to have a daughter”

Breaking Bad: Walt strangles Krazy 8 after holding him hostage in the basement

TandT: “When I found out that Sami was a girl I wanted to name her ‘America’. I wanted her name to be Miss America”

BB: Walt lets his partner’s girlfriend choke to death on her own vomit.

TandT: “I prayed and prayed and prayed that God would give me Miss America”.

BB: Walt tries to poison Tuco

TandT: "In Sami’s age group they don’t tend to tan all the babies.  She tends to be the only one."

BB: Walt misses the birth of his daughter because he is making a drug deal

TandT: “A lot of times judges can have problems with babies in full glitz.  They may expect babies to not be spray tanned, to not have make-up so we’re really hoping that they judge for full glitz.”

BB: Walt browbeats his 15 year old son into drinking tequila until he pukes.

TandT: “The baby category is very competitive"

BB: Walt is trying to make enough money to take care of his family.

Ultimately I decided that Walter isn't the worst since he has some redeeming qualities.  I cannot say the same for the Walters.

Not Mr. Bottle

Overall Rating for the Walters

Taste: 1
Presentation: 3
Ease of Preparation: 4
Drinks Until Blackout: 5 – 24% Alcohol

1.5 oz Scotch Whisky
1 tbsp Orange Juice
1 tbsp Lemon Juice

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