|The appearance is quite misleading|
This got me thinking about calendars in general and then I remembered my awesome idea for a new and better calendar. I came up with this a few years ago so many of you may have already seen it, but I feel obligated to share it again:
- Weeks are 8 days long
- The first eleven months are 4 weeks long (32 days)
- December is 13 days long in non-leap years and 14 days in leap years.
- December is a national holiday. Everything remains closed except retail stores, grocery stores, and Chick-fil-a.
- The standard work week is still 5 days (Monday – Friday)
- There is an extra day between Saturday and Sunday. We will name it something like “Gerald” so we can get rid of that corny “Only on days that end in Y” joke.
Before you get all riled up about the current Gregorian Calendar being the widely recognized Christian standard, remember that it was implemented in 1582. Galileo was convicted of heresy in 1632 for saying that the Earth orbits around the Sun. I’m just saying that scientific knowledge wasn’t exactly at its apex in the 16th century.
There are really a lot of benefits to this system. You get a three day weekend every week. The two week holiday at the end of the year just formalizes what is already a common practice for many. It will require a massive effort to print new calendars and re-program every computer. All watches with calendars and so-called perpetual calendars will need to be replaced. This will provide a massive economic stimulus. I estimate the economic impact will be over one quadrillion dollars.
One quadrillion dollars also happens to be the amount you would have to pay us to drink today’s drink the Twin Peach again. The Twin Peach is a mix of peach schnapps and cranberry juice. The peach and cranberry did not complement each other at all. Mrs. Bottle remarked that all the schnapps did was ruin the cranberry juice. It made the drink cloying and gross and at less than 7% alcohol you would definitely be better off just having some plain juice. I’m beginning to wonder if it possible to use peach schnapps in a drink and have it taste good. This is our third try and none of the drinks have rated higher than a three.
|The Twin Peach had a flavor odder than anything in this show|
Overall Rating for the Twin Peach
Ease of Preparation: 5
Drinks Until Blackout: 13 – 7% Alcohol
2 oz Peach Schnapps