Tighty Whities

Last night we were transported to gay Paree where I left Mr. Bottle so I’ll be updating our dozens of readers on the events that transpired. A friend of ours was turning 40 and decided to have a “Le Diner en Blanc” to celebrate. If you’re wondering, this translates to “Dinner in White” but I had to spend several minutes explaining to Mr. Bottle that it was not a party for only white folks. Apparently in France, people meet up in a grocery store parking lot wearing all white and then travel to a surprise location for a meal together. Then what happens is that the hosts get caught in traffic due to a downed power line from a thunderstorm but since they’re the only ones who know where you’re going, you spend a lot of time in the parking lot waiting for them while getting a lot of stares. Possibly because a group of people dressed in white standing in a circle in a parking lot looks a little on the cult-y side.   Maybe they were trying to figure out why we weren’t chanting.

This isn't us, but we looked about the same
img: accesshollywood.com

So I did do a little research on white parties and what I learned from this extensive time reading Wikipedia is that in America they seem to mean something slightly different than in France. Aside from weddings at the beach, when people in America are dressed in all white, they may be participating in a circuit party as part of the LGBT community. Huh. Ultimately, I’m not sure why you have to be dressed in white for the French party, but maybe it’s just because “blanc” sounds better than “verte”.

What all this does mean is that we didn’t have an opportunity to compose a beverage from Mr. Boston for today. However the hostess did offer up a peach flavored sparkling wine which I’ll be happy to comment on. Each plastic cup was served with a small slice of peach and the flavor was actually pretty tasty. Both Mr. Bottle and I consumed several half-filled cups all by ourselves. But the important thing to note about this particular product is the name: Amour de Paris. While at Commerçant Joes, our birthday girl caught sight of the proper noun on the label and without knowing if it was tasty, she snagged several bottles of the bubbly. Since it turned out to by quite yummy, I think I’ll pick up some next time instead of the Deux Buck Chuck.

Le background en blanc

And even though so many of my friends have been turning the big 4-0 this year, I think I’ve learned the most from this particular birthday party. I am a bit younger than all of my friends so it will be a long time before I will be celebrating, but I’ll write things down here in the meantime. First, definitely make everyone wear a color that they might not look good in but makes you look smashing. Our hostess looked gorgeous in white so I’m picking orange for my soiree since it complements my autumn complexion. Actually, that’s what I’ll tell everyone but then I’ll wear black and look super cool while they look like pumpkins. The second thing I’ve learned is that I am younger than all my friends.  There is no third thing.

So I now realize that Mr. Bottle and I are in serious trouble.  At some point we hope to go to Paris and now I understand we will need more white clothes to bring with us. Only then will it be parfaite, merci.